Hell Week: The Dark Side of Tea

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The Man Who Almost Died from Drinking Too Much Tea – The Atlantic
Teen Develops Hepatitis From Green Tea – The Daily Mail
College Student Dies After Drinking Poppy Seed Tea – NY Daily News
Deadly Pesticides In Tea? A Fact Check – Tea Biz Blog

Sip safely, my friends!
Artwork by Ivana Jancikova

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Fancy Time Tea Tips

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While I consider myself a learned student of all things steepable and sippable, I don’t pretend to be overly concerned with the way things ‘ought to be’: I drink my bagged Twingings out of an obscenely large mug just like everyone else.

Well, other than a Tips phase in my early 20s, where only 1 bag steeped for 3.5 minutes (I had a timer) then flavored with 1 teaspoon (I had a specific spoon) of sugar (white granulated only) and a splash (took months of training for my then-boyfriend to understand ‘splash’) of 2% milk. But at some point I realized that sometimes tea, like life, can be taken casually, and white-knuckling it through a particularly bitter cup was just a part of the experience. But I digress.

When it comes to proper tea, the British have me beat, as evidenced in this list of tips by Vogue. Not all apply to everyone – I don’t do clotted cream – but there are some good ones in there. Such as!

  • DO: Always use loose tea. It tastes so much better.
  • DO: Enjoy at a leisurely pace.
  • DON’T: Serve white tea, green tea, and infusions with milk. Black tea, however, is suitable with milk.

(Exception to tip #3 is earl gray, of course.)

Sadly there is one outright lie lurking in the DON’T catagory:

  • DON’T: Extend your pinky finger.

But… everyone knows a delicately extended pinky is the universal sign of fancy!

How to Drink Tea Like a Royal @Vogue